What do you do when...

Well, I'm glad you asked!  ;)

As it happens, waking up cranky and things going downhill from there happens quite often to me, and even more so lately. I think it has to do with my menopausal years. I have been experiencing intensified imbalance in several ways for a couple of years now, and it seems to increase still.

I have been cranky and moody and stuff for all of my life. I thought I had to change and not be like that anymore. But it didn't happen, no matter what and how hard I tried. What I have found works is this: doing as little about it as possible. Retreat. Let myself be.  As much as I can.

Trying to change it will only make it worse. I think, being with what is is one of the greatest challenges of being human. We so want things differently then they are most of the time, and we so want ourselves to be different from who we are and how we are most of the time as well. Learning to let myself be cranky has done me a lot of good.  :) 

I read a lot. Always have. Reading is easy for me. I love to disappear into a book, walk around in other people's life, enjoying the way it's done. I'm a writer, learning about writing when I'm reading even when I'm cranky, it just comes to me naturally. When I'm cranky, I spend as much time as I can alone in my room, reading and waiting for this cloud to pass. Eventually, it will.

My family knows it's best to just let me be and have fun without me. I love them for that. I love that they go out or stay at home and do fun things and don't expect me to join them. They have learned, like I have, that it wouldn't be much fun if I tried to please them and do anything other then retreat and let myself be. It doesn't work. It's not fun to have me around when I'm cranky, and I don't want to do things when I'm in that state. It's good to know yourself and give yourself space for what you need, in 'good' days as in 'bad'…

Hey Angel; great to feel your honesty!

Half or more of my journey has been about simply acknowledging that I am human and that stuff happens that I can't rationalise or deep breathe my way out of… but I finally figured out that I probably just shouldn't take action until the feeling has passed. And it passes, it always does.

I've begun applying the wave analogy to emotions… they build, they peak, they break and they flow away… then you're 'back'! It's kind of like detaching from perfection and letting life happen as it should, in its time. Taking any action when in a heightened state, will have to be taken in the context of what the result will likely be… something also heightened, and possibly a little bit harder to 'fix'…

Just some thoughts; hope they are helpful somehow.

Much love, sherri